50 Shades of RuneMoon
by owlfawn
Summary: A compilation of bedtime stories. I apologize in advance for this pile of crap. lots of crack and it's just bad. all of it. Cover image by roiaru.
1. Candace and Wizard

Once, there were two unbelievably shy people. No one understood them when they spoke, because they spoke on a frequency only shy people could hear. So when the day came that Candace said, "Good morning." In her tiny voice and Gale heard it, it initiated a conversation that would set their destiny 5ever.

After months of conversations no one could fucking understand, Gale and Candace announced- well more like whispered with really long pauses- that they were dating.

Now, this wouldn't be a shocker, but their relationship wasn't what it seemed. It was thanks to Luna, who stalked her sister outside that heard something that would change EVERYTHING.

"G-Gale, I'm s-scared. What if s-someone hears m-me?"

"Don worry bby I'll jus kess u n it'll b okei"

"A-Are you sure? I t-thought I heard s-someone…"

"ssshhhhhshhhh it wuz jus my dick"

"o-oh. Ok."

And then they had vigorous sex.

**TWO SEASONS LATER:**

"Gale, get off your a-ass and help me with the b-baby!"

"iss not my baby bitch"

"I-It is yours! You put yo dick in me n now we have a baby."

"shit ur right"

"help me"

"no fuq u"

"You already d-did that"

_**THE FUCKING END OF CHAPTER 1**_


	2. Gray and Sophia

Once there was a girl who was weird as fuck. Like, seriously. She spoke in opposites and shit and no one could understand her.

EXCEPT ONE BOY- NO, A MAN.

He loved every kinky piece of that fine ass.

In fact, he loved her so much, he began to take pictures of her in provocative clothing and stored the pictures in a shoebox under his bed, without her knowing.

But then she found the shoebox while she was laying on his floor. When she confronted him, it went like this:

"Gray wat **isn't **this?"

"… Well it's definitely not a box of my pornos."

"Oh well then I guess it **isn't okay**."

And then they had sex and all was good.

And Gray still took pictures.

_**END OF CHAPTER FUCKING TWO.**_


	3. Selena and Luke But Mostly Selena

Once there was a girl named Selena. Selena danced hot and was like, "Let me move to Castanet."

So she moved and got a job at the bar.

Once she got this job, there was this EXTREME GUY named Luke who was like, "Let's get drunk."

So they got drunk.

They fucked.

And when Selena got preggers and popped out that baby, Luke dropped it on its head.

_**THE FUCKING END OF CHAPTER 3**_


	4. Wizard, Selena, and Hiro Part One?

so 1 day selna an wizrd were gonnan do the dirty deed but den selna was liek 'wiz'

'wat'

an den she holded out a codnum

'put this on ur magic wand ok i dont want no bbs'

'how do i do dat'

'… is dis ur 1st tiem'

wizrd blushd '… mebbe'

'it's like a sock but 4 ur magic wand'

'who puts socks on their manbits'

'… hiro?' selna sed.

wizrd jus staerd 4 long time '….. how wud u no dat, selna'

'….. i-i dont kno'

'HOW WUD U NO DAT SELNA' WIZRD CRAID

'HE LEFT DA WINDOW OPEN AN I SAW OK'

'… does he leev his window open often?'

'… mebbe, y?'

'… lets watch him 2gethr'

an so dey go to hiro's hous and hiro is all 'ooo mr. kana ooooo'

and da sock was painted like kana and also rainbows

and wizrd was liek 'dats not kana' an hiro was like 'omg wat da flibbertigibbet u guise'

and den wizrd shaepshifed in2 kana and hiro was all 'omgogmogmgomgogmgomomgomgogm ogmgomgo'

and selena was all 'gomgogmogmgomgomomgogmomgogm ogmgomgomg'

and den dey had 3sum

and a few weeks later hiro was like 'wizrd im preggis'

'wat do u meen preggis ur a boy'

'i missed my perd'

'ur a boy'

'so. luke has perds'

an den dey told selena and she was all 'wat do u meen luke has perds, hes a boy'

so the 3 of dem wen to luuk and aksed him about his perds and luuk was liek 'omg dats private u pervits'

so dey went thru his perse and found perdsticks

den dey went to jin so hiro could have a checkup and jin was all 'how did u not no u could get preggis. did you not heer rules of jin'

den hiro was like 'wats rules of jin?' and so jin told him and he was even more confus

but then jin checked hiro up and found babby and so selna and wizrd had 2 think of name

an selna wer liek 'how about sanjay?' an den wizard was liek 'no das gay'

'says de man named gayle'

'yu sut ur hor mouf, selna'

an den hiro was liek 'how abot we name it after ur parents, wizrd'

and den wizrd slapped him an yell 'MI PARENTS R DEEEEEED'

and cry falled out of his eyes

and cry falled out of hiros eyes 2

and cry falled out of selna's eyes 3 bcus her boyfrans were fiting

2 b continu…?!

end of chaper 1


	5. Luke and The Couples Part 1

luke had a prblm

he had a bad habbet of walking in on da couples.

see they were gunna do da nasty

the hanky panky

the "horizontal monster mash" as chase so offen told luke

anywaize

one time, luke waz like

"omg lemme go say hi to my good extreme not homosexual frend chaise"

so he jumpd off da mounten and went to chasss howse

and he punched da door

"CHASE BRO DUDE MAN IM COMIN IN"

and he opend da door

and he looked to da left

and he gaspedd

there, muffy and chaiseee were nekid and dey were on da table

and luke jus stared

because chases girlfran was hot

but then again so was chases mom

chaiseeeee got mad and yelld

"LUKE OMQ GET OUT IM TRYING TO- UH- UH-" he lookd at muffy. "I'M TRYINA GET LAID OK"

"OMG CHASE U CANT JUST SAY It LIKE THAAAAT"

"MUFFY SH MY PEEN IS STILL INSIDE AND IT TICKLES WHEN YOU YELL"

"WAT"

"Guys, I'm gonna go."

and so luke left

and he was like

"what the fuck just happen"

and so he go to see his othur best fran.


	6. Luke and The Couples Part 2

luke went to see his other best fran

owun

he jumpd back 2 da mowntain

and he fell in da chimney at owuns unkuls howse

"Owen, bud ya in hurrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRrrrrr?"

he hurd da noisez but where they come from?

he go find out

he went to da back room but no1 was der

so he went 2 owen room and he hurd da noizez again

and he knoked on da door because he can b polite when he wants 2 be

and he sed

"owen im luke pls let me in im hungry and chaize ez mad me"

luke got confuse

how did he say out loud

he forgets about that and he knocked on da door again

"OWEN IM GONNA OPEN THE DOOR OK"

why he was yelling, he didnt know

noises got louder i guess

he opend tha door

and he gaspud

own and selfie

not like selphie like omg pose 4 da picture alone in ma room

but selfy dat hot library ann from anotha cuntry

own gapsed

slehpy gasbed

"look luke look luke" own gaspd again and kind of chokd

selpy pat hias back

he says thank

"Owen, I'm gonna go home now"

"but im a hot libran"

"i know but i forgot to feed my dog"

"oh, I guess u shoud do that then"

"yeah. seeya later own"

"bye lukee"

and luke went home

he didnt have to fed boss

boss got fedded yestday

boss not hungry again

luke sat at the bridge

luke sighed

why was everyone getting laid today


	7. Gill and Luke

Gil lieked doin manly things. Liek gardening. Lik e he was doin right now.

Flowesh wer super manly. Den Luek wuz walkin by and he sawd Gill doin flowash in hes garden.

Luek had ta say sumthin cuz Gil l wuz looked liek a grl.

"UMG GILL UR SUCH A GURL U LIEK FLOWHS"

Gill wuz mad. "IM NOTA GARL LUEK GOWAY"

"u shud prof it then" luek sed.

"I dun gota pruv nothing"

"yes u do cuz othwize u a grll"

Gill wuz so angrul he strip all de cloths off an threw dem on da groun. "SE IM NOTTA GIRL LUKE"

Luek laffed so hadr. "GILL UR DEICK IS SO SMLAL I DEDNT EVAN KNO DEY CUD BE DAT SMAL"

Gill sploded. "IST NOT SMALL URS IS SMLAL"

And den Luek strped off all his clthes an thro dem on da groun. "MY DIKC ISSNT SMALA LIEK URS GILIGIEN"

Gil wuz super duepr mad den.

But den Luek sed "emg Gill lest hav angery secks" Gil wan say no bt he sed yus.

And den dey did it on top of gil flowhs and squhsed dem. Gil creyd cuz of his squshed flowehs but he aslo hapy an agner cuz Luek's big dikc wuz insid him.

THE END


	8. Raguna

Ragnau was the guardian. He was a guardian of many things, like people and animals and stuff. But not his memory. If he cared about his memory, it'd still be there.

Anyways, he was the guardian of the booty. The Ass. That ass, ass, ass, ass, ass, ass.

He did a good job of guarding the ass, but sometimes he was 2 late.

He was 2 busy lookin and guardin bianca's bootylicious booty to protect the rest of the booties.

So, the booties were violated and it was a bad time.

Raguana failed 2 do his duty as the Ass Guardian.

So he **ass**embled a team of guardians.

Luke was the Tittie Protector.

Selna had something to do with feet.

Gray probably protected Sophia or something I'm not that sure to be honest.

Together, they did protecting stuff.

They all sucked at their jobs though.

Butts were touched, Boobies were fondled, wanton mewling happened.

Things just sucked.

Ragnea sucked at his job.


End file.
